I have to share this beautiful picture. My family and I were at a beachfront restaurant in Chateaubelair, St. Vincent and the Grenadines on January 6th, enjoying the sound of the waves and the gentle sea breeze. My daughter’s face was turned towards the sea. She said to me in awe, “Ma, look at that. Half the place is raining and the other half is not. Half have sunlight and half do not. And look, Ma, there is a double rainbow over there. Have you ever seen that?” she asked, her excitement palpable as she reached for her phone and snapped this picture. I am no psychic or philosopher, but this vivid scene speaks to me at a time when SVG (St. Vincent and the Grenadines) has a new government with big plans to turn our blessed country around. The country is coming out of a gloomy past, marked by uncertainty and discontent, and heading into brighter days filled with hope and opportunity. It won’t happen overnight, and it wouldn’t be an easy task, but brighter days are undoubtedly on the horizon. Let’s not hinder progress by holding onto a toxic past that got the masses nowhere except stuck in the mud of poverty, division, and crime. Each of us should look to see what we can do to move SVG forward, not just for ourselves but for future generations who deserve a prosperous homeland. It may be something as simple as changing our mindset, fostering a sense of community, and having a positive attitude towards the future. Maybe we have skills to transfer, talents that can be shared to uplift those around us. Also, those in positions to help in other ways, whether through leadership, mentorship, or philanthropy, should lead with generosity and vision. There are many ways each of us can contribute to the betterment of SVG, from volunteering in local initiatives to supporting small businesses, and ensuring that no one is left behind. Let’s roll up our sleeves and move our nation forward together, united in purpose and determination. Let’s remember, whatever our cross, whatever our pain, God always sends rainbows after the rain, reminding us that hope is always present, even after the storms of life.
Trish St.Hill
The Official Blog of Trish St.Hill
Trish St. Hill was born in the vibrant and culturally rich nation of St. Vincent and the Grenadines in the West Indies. As an English-speaking West Indian immigrant, she experienced firsthand the lack of literature representing the struggles of Caribbean immigrants in the United States.
Visit my website: https://www.trishsthill.com
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There truly is no place like my homeland. While it has been tainted with political vindictiveness from the former government, SVG (St. Vincent and the Grenadines), has always brought me a profound sense of special joy whenever I visited. Each trip felt like a homecoming, with the warmth of the island’s bright sun reflecting the warmth of its people. Yet, there was undeniably a heaviness about the island—young minds unemployed or underemployed, a dilapidated infrastructure, and a severe case of cronyism that permeated this once-blessed paradise. However, as logic dictates, everything has an end; on November 27th, a new government was ushered in by the former opposition party, NDP, marking a pivotal moment in our history. Jubilation filled the airwaves both in the diaspora and in SVG, reverberating through every heart that longed for a brighter tomorrow. Everyone commented on how light and hopeful the island felt, as if it had finally been relieved of a long-standing blight. On January 3rd, I flew to SVG to join part of my family who had ventured there a week ahead of me, eager to witness the changes firsthand. I can truly attest to feeling a welcomed transformation encompassing the island—there was vibrancy, optimism, and a lightness I hadn’t felt in years whenever I stepped foot on this cherished land. My hat off to the new government of SVG for taking the reins and, just as importantly, for adopting a holistic approach towards governance that values every member of the community. From the smallest children exuberantly playing on the streets to vendors energetically selling their goods and visitors marveling at the scenery, there is a profound sense that change is in the air, and the people are embracing it with open arms. My greatest hope is that the new government will continue to fulfill their mandate for governing the country effectively and transparently, ensuring that the rich cultural heritage and stunning natural beauty of SVG are preserved for future generations. Furthermore, I hope that the people, both at home and in the diaspora, will roll up their sleeves and actively engage in the efforts to move the country forward, contributing their skills and passion to the nation’s development. May God continue to bless the government and the people of SVG, so that together we can forge a brighter and more prosperous future.
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My trip to St.Vincent and the Grenadines was a short but very productive one, filled with mixed emotions and unexpected challenges. My daughter and grandson arrived a week ahead of me, excited to explore the beauty of the island. The plan was for me to meet them there and return two weeks later, a week after they depart for New York. It all started on a high note, with laughter and the joy of family togetherness, until we received the heartbreaking news that our beloved pet dog Rambo was sick with lymphoma (cancer of the lymphatic system). Panic set in as I realized that this could be a life-altering situation for us. I immediately bought a ticket to return with my family a week before my scheduled return, prioritizing Rambo’s health and our need to be with him during this difficult time. To date, it is my shortest trip to St. Vincent, marked by both treasured memories and a profound sense of potential loss. There were so many loved ones I never got to see on this trip, their absence palpable, yet I understood it was a necessary exit to make it back to our little buddy, whose wellbeing weighs heavily on our hearts. For many, he is just a dog; for our family, he is a cherished family member who has brought us countless moments of joy and unconditional love. His wagging tail and playful spirit serve as a reminder of the simple joys in life, and our bond with him deepens with each passing day, illuminating the importance of returning home to a pet who is dear to us. After a frustrating two-hour delay in St. Vincent, we finally made it back home, our hearts heavy with worry yet hopeful. Despite being sick and losing some weight, Rambo greeted us with sheer excitement and tail wags that filled the room with warmth. His caretaker for that week is a trusted family friend, who worked diligently to ensure he had a proper diagnosis and was cared for to the best of her ability. Despite his lack of appetite, she was able to spoon some food into him, gently encouraging him to take his cocktail of medications, all while showering him with affection, prayers and trying with everything she had to comfort and care for him. So now we continue to shower him with love, prayers, and hope for a miracle, so we could enjoy the little guy a little longer, cherishing every moment we have with him as he continues to fight this battle with all the strength he can muster.
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Together in the end side by side. My parents’ marriage was a story of true love, a saga enriched by shared experiences, laughter, and occasional challenges that only deepened their bond. I have always said their love was a textbook study of true, healthy love, a rare gem that shone brightly in a world often filled with fleeting connections. They disagreed without being disagreeable, engaging in thoughtful discussions that showcased their mutual respect and understanding. As parents, they parented with one voice, able to navigate the complexities of raising 14 children with remarkable unity, and they never went to bed without each other, always cherishing those quiet moments of connection at the day’s end. I would always joke that that was the reason for them having 14 children, attributing their large family to their unwavering affection and commitment to each other. I visited their graves in Troumaca, St.Vincent last Tuesday with a melancholy spirit, the weight of nostalgia heavy upon me. Before heading to their gravesite, I picked them flowers from their yard in Barrouallie and made two small bouquets, longing to take a piece of the homestead to them, a reminder of the love that flourished there. When I arrived at their graves, it brought me great peace seeing them side by side, united even in eternity, a powerful symbol of their enduring love. Thanks to my cousin who always weeds their graves and places candles on them, ensuring that their resting place remains a testament to the love they shared. We spent 15 minutes plucking a few pieces of grass from their graves and talking to them, sharing stories and memories that felt alive in the air around us. It may seem strange to some, but I felt compelled to let them know I was okay, to share the milestones of my life since they departed. I brought my grandson Amir to visit his great-granny, a remarkable woman who loved him beyond words and cherished every moment spent with him. It was a heartfelt occasion as I introduced him to my father in spirit, a man he never had the pleasure of meeting but who undoubtedly lives on in our shared memories. Additionally, my grandson got to see where his great-great-grandmother, Eugenia Charles, was buried, a connection to our family’s past that I explained to him in detail. As I shared stories about his ancestors, including how my father was laid to rest in his mother’s tomb, Amir listened intently, his eyes wide with awe. What a day of family history it was, filled with laughter, tears, and a profound sense of belonging as I reminisced about the joys and challenges they faced. I thank both my parents for giving me life, for being my greatest supporters against the world, and for instilling in me the unwavering values of love, compassion, and resilience that guide me every day. May their souls continue to R.I.P. side by side, their legacy of love echoing through the generations they left behind, inspiring us to carry forward the principles that unite us as a family.
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I have always said that my main love is not as a writer, but rather as a storyteller. It is my most effective form of communication. So please indulge me to tell this simple tale of love. Last night was a special night for our family, a night filled with love, laughter, and cherished memories. We got to celebrate our oldest sibling’s 70th birthday, a remarkable milestone that reflects a lifetime of experiences and wisdom. My brother Len had a birthday to remember, one that showcased how deeply he is loved and appreciated by his family. His wife and children went to extraordinary lengths to put on an epic event for his 70th, leaving no detail overlooked, ensuring that everything was perfect. His daughters, Maurica and Dia, along with his wife Sylvina, did a phenomenal job decorating the space. The vibrant colors and thoughtful touches created an atmosphere of joy, while the delicious aromas wafting from the kitchen hinted at some of the most scrumptious foods we could anticipate. Each dish was a labor of love, crafted with care and creativity, showcasing their culinary talents.
My brother Junie and I had the crucial task of picking him up early for breakfast, a delightful opportunity to spend some quality time with him. The event was a surprise, so our job was to keep him occupied while the preparations were in full swing. It was heartwarming to share stories and laughter, reminiscing about the past and discussing what the future holds for him. Through careful coordination, we arrived at the event to a waiting crowd, their faces echoing waves of nostalgia and excitement as they eagerly anticipated his arrival. The music was beautiful, selecting his favorite tunes that transported us back in time, and the ambiance was mesmerizing, enveloping us in a warm, familial embrace. But my favorite part of the evening was undoubtedly the tributes. Tears were flowing, each word spoken a testament to the impact he has had on our lives. I imagined our dear mother was fluttering overhead, smiling down on the gathering with pride as we celebrated not just his birthday, but the incredible man he has become.As I stood looking at the event, I looked back at our days in Camden Park, St. Vincent and the Grenadines when our mother was running late from early morning shopping, how he would fill in by twisting me and my sister’s hair into hysterically looking pigtails, preparing us breakfast and taking us down the steep slope of Eddy Hill, before walking us up to Lowmans School. Before the age of 10, he could cook, clean, and wash like any adult, no doubt a weight put on him as the oldest child. But he did it with grace, always making us feel special and safe that he had our backs. So it was special to look back on the last 70 years of his life. But yesterday was special not only because he turned 70 years, marking a significant chapter in his life, but also because less than a year ago he faced a serious car accident that almost cost him his life. To see him return to good health and celebrating this milestone is a beautiful thing that fills our hearts with gratitude. Most people get those tributes only when they are dead and can’t hear them, but my big brother got his roses while he is alive and strong, surrounded by those who love him most.
As the patriarch of the family, he is special to us, a guiding light who has always been there in times of need. We truly appreciate his contributions to his family and us, his younger siblings, who look up to him with admiration. He is a man of few words packed with wisdom, a quiet strength that shepherds his flock with firm but loving hands. His presence grounds us, and his guidance helps us navigate life’s challenges. Happy birthday, big brother. We love and appreciate you more than words can express, and we look forward to creating many more beautiful memories together in the years to come.
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Unfortunately, in life, we all go through some type of grief. But the most painful grief is over the loss of a loved one, and this kind of sorrow often feels like an insurmountable burden that weighs heavily on our hearts and minds. No matter how hard we try, we can never be fully prepared for how to deal with it, as the heartache can strike when we least expect it, often catching us off guard. There is no playbook or guidelines on how to navigate the tumultuous waters of grief or a specific timeframe on when to get over it; it is a deeply personal journey that differs for everyone. We can only leave it to God and time, allowing ourselves to heal at our own pace, even if that means taking one small step forward and several steps back.
But having a support system around you could be immensely helpful during this difficult time. Having people reach out with a text, a phone call, or a card can go a long way in reminding you that you are not alone in your pain, reinforcing the notion that connection and community can provide solace in moments of despair. Equally important is giving yourself grace to feel sad; it’s a vital part of the healing process that should not be rushed. The important thing is that you try every day to accept the support offered to you and take tiny steps to avoid isolating yourself from those who care, opening up yourself to the love and compassion that surrounds you. Simple gestures like chatting with someone, taking a walk, listening to music, or indulging in a luxurious bath that may help soothe your spirit can be profoundly healing. It’s essential to recognize that with time, the frequency and intensity of the sadness do become more bearable, transitioning from a sharp pang to a more dull ache, which is a sign of healing.For those on the supporting end, be conscious of the fact that the person you are supporting may not always seem warm or eager to communicate, and it’s crucial not to take it personally; their emotional state often isn’t a reflection of your care. Let them know, in your words or actions, that you are there anytime they need you, and ensure that you truly mean it with sincerity and patience. If they seem overwhelmed and don’t want to talk or answer the phone, send a gentle text letting them know you are praying for them and that you’re here whenever they need you, reminding them that your support is unwavering. If they appear to be in the mood for companionship, consider taking them out or visiting them with something you know they would enjoy to eat; a small act of kindness can lighten a heavy heart. But remember to let them express themselves and talk about whatever they wish to discuss, permitting the conversation to follow their lead.
Perhaps they want to share their feelings, recount cherished memories, or even switch topics entirely to politics or the weather—whatever brings them comfort in that moment, let them lead the conversation. Being there, listening, and validating their emotions can significantly contribute to their healing journey, as the act of being present can remind them of the love that surrounds them, even amidst their grief. Sometimes, simply knowing that someone cares enough to sit quietly with them during their pain can be the most profound form of support. -
On August 16th, 2025, my daughter and I attended the yearly Vincy Day celebration at Heckscher State Park on Long Island, New York. This event has become an essential part of our annual calendar, a time dedicated to reconnecting with our roots and celebrating the vibrant culture of St. Vincent and the Grenadines. Because we regrettably missed last year’s festivities due to a family wedding, this year felt particularly significant. The anticipation was palpable as we woke early that morning, the warmth of the summer sun peeking through the windows, motivating us to prepare our favorite dishes. The tantalizing aromas filled our home, creating an atmosphere of excitement and joy, making the day even more special.
After cooking, we packed our SUV with not just food, but also a tent, tables, and chairs, ensuring we had everything we needed to enjoy a full day of mingling and feasting with our brothers and sisters from our beautiful island nation. The drive to the park was filled with chatter; my daughter and I reminisced about previous Vincy Days, recalling the laughter and joy we shared, fostering a sense of adventure as we looked forward to creating new memories.
Over the years, one of the most remarkable aspects I have come to admire about this event is how thousands of Vincentians gather without incident. It is heartwarming to see people from the Caribbean, Canada, and various cities across the United States converge on Heckscher State Park, all sharing a common bond rooted in our heritage. The moment we arrived, laughter and cheerful greetings filled the air, making it quickly apparent that this gathering transcends mere festivities—it is a reunion of old friends and families. Neighbors and colleagues, who may not have seen each other in years, embrace and reconnect, celebrating the enduring bonds that tie us to our homeland. The atmosphere buzzes with an undeniable camaraderie, where there is no room for politics, violence, or old grudges—just a peaceful celebration under the warm summer breeze of Long Island.
Every participant celebrates our unique culture in his or her own way, each contribution enriching the rich tapestry of the day by sharing meals and stories of life back home. It is an incredible experience to witness: nothing is sold here. Instead, every dish is a generous gift, an offering woven with memories and nostalgia, each bite echoing the flavors and warmth of our island life. As we partake in the diverse array of dishes, from familiar homemade favorites to delightful surprises brought by others, we find joy in sharing and reminiscing, reliving precious moments from the past. The tantalizing aromas waft through the air, mingling with laughter and shouts of delight from children playing nearby, creating a vibrant symphony of joy and togetherness.
Music also plays a pivotal role in setting the atmosphere for this gathering. The enchanting sounds of calypso, reggae, and gospel echo throughout the park, forming a vibrant backdrop that captures the very essence of Vincy culture. The rhythmic tempo beckons many to dance; both young and old moving together, swaying to the beats, each step a testament to our history and identity. Whether dancing or simply enjoying the music, there is a collective revelry in the joyous atmosphere, where smiles are abundant and connections are deepened, reinforcing the bonds we share as a community.
To say I am proud of the spirit of this event is an understatement. I am immensely grateful to those who diligently plan and organize this gathering year after year, working tirelessly to ensure it remains a vibrant part of our community. Their unwavering commitment to preserving our cultural heritage fills me with admiration. I am also thankful for the unbreakable spirit of our people, for our profound love for our blessed homeland, and for our shared ability to come together peacefully. This event serves as a vital cultural tool in the diaspora, a reminder of our roots and a way to keep our heritage alive with dignity and love.
As we dance and share stories, I often reflect on the importance of this celebration. It extends beyond simple festivities; it signifies resilience and unity. My heartfelt hope is that we never let this event die; that it will continue to flourish and adapt through the years, enriching the lives of generations to come. May we always find strength in each other, keeping the essence of our homeland close to our hearts as we build connections, celebrate culture, and pass on the legacy of our beautiful island to future generations. This gathering not only strengthens our current ties but also lays a foundation for our children and grandchildren, ensuring they too can partake in the beauty and memories of our shared heritage.
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While it is interesting to discuss my literary journey, one of my greatest passions is to cover real societal issues that affect our lives in profound ways. I’ve been told that my novels are spellbinding and historically informative, weaving intricate narratives that resonate with readers on a deeper level. However, covering real-life issues is even more satisfying to me, as it allows me to directly engage with the complexities of human experience. When I started my blog, it was with the intention of covering a mixture of topics – the writing process and experience, nostalgic moments, and coping with real-life issues that many individuals face daily. I strive to focus on the fact that, whatever the topic, someone in society can garner some insight or coping strategies to navigate their unique challenges. By sharing personal anecdotes, research, and thoughtful reflections, I aim to create a safe space for dialogue and understanding. Some of the topics covered so far include the following:
- Navigating the Avenues of Change
- Identifying your ride or die
- Embracing the stages of Life – Menopause
- Living a cleaner lifestyle – Part 1 and II
- The emotions of writing – Part 1 & II
- When or what do I name my book
- Dissecting my writing style within a cultural framework
- Making a book a page turner
- Start writing and keep the momentum going
- From writing to publishing: My journey as an author
In keeping with my original intention, I created a comprehensive list of topics I would like to cover for upcoming blog posts. Some topics may overlap somewhat; however, each topic is designed to bring new insight into our world and, hopefully, offer valuable coping skills along with a fresh perspective on societal views. As we navigate through these complex times, it’s essential to explore various themes, including mental health awareness, the impact of social stress, and the importance of community support. Additionally, I aim to delve into the significance of self-care practices, the role of resilience in facing adversity, and how cultural diversity enriches our understanding of different viewpoints. Some of the topics I plan to cover include, but are not limited to, the following:
- Dealing with trauma – death, divorce, job loss
- Showing support during a loss
- Destigmatizing mental challenges
- Managing Anxiety levels
- What are scary thoughts trying to tell us?
- Can hypochondriasis be managed?
- Dealing with challenges to avoid depression
- Discarding destructive secrets
- Restarting life after a big change
- Creating healthy circles to remove toxicity
- Anger is different from moving on
- Removing the filters that hold you back
- Creating healthy support outlets
- Maintaining healthy relationships realistically
- Stop the search for perfection
- Harnessing the power within you
- Strategies to de-stress
- Practicing the serenity prayer
- Policing your health
- Secrets to everlasting fidelity
- Karma – myth or reality
- Importance of Cultural identity
- Cultural assimilation vs conversion
- Is escapism healthy?
- Differentiating between dreams and goals
You can stay in touch with me on several platforms – my blog, website, YouTube, email, or social media. Each of these channels offers a unique way for us to connect, engage, and share ideas that matter to us both. For instance, my blog is a treasure trove of insights where I explore various topics in depth, delving into intricate details that stimulate thoughtful discussions. In addition to articles, I often include personal anecdotes and practical tips that can benefit readers in their everyday lives. Meanwhile, I intend to grow my YouTube channel to feature engaging videos that hopefully complement the written content, providing visual storytelling and tutorials that will hopefully enhance your understanding of the subjects we tackle together. You can also reach out to me via email for more personal discussions or inquiries, where I love to dive deeper into the subjects that pique your interest. Don’t forget to check out my Linktree account below, where you can seamlessly navigate to all my platforms in a streamlined fashion. I truly encourage and appreciate your feedback, as I relish hearing your thoughts about my articles and content; your insights help me grow and create even more valuable material for you and our community. I have also been considering a Vlog, which I believe would add a more intimate element to my interaction with viewers, allowing us to share experiences and conversations in a more relatable manner. Your participation in this journey is incredibly important to me, so stay tuned for more updates as we continue to explore these exciting avenues together!
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Visit my website at http://www.trishsthill.com
Like most people, my ability to embrace change is very difficult. As someone who just went through some serious changes, I am very mindful of the importance of letting go. In 2024, I retired from my job after almost 30 years, a milestone that felt surreal and momentous. One month after I retired, I lost my beloved mother, a profound loss that left an indelible mark on my heart. Six months later, my only son informed me he wanted to join the military, a decision that both filled me with pride and anxiety. It was a tumultuous time, to say the least, a whirlwind of emotions that made daily life feel like navigating through a storm. But my motto of making lemonade when life threw you lemons prevailed, and I found myself diving deeper into self-reflection.
I hatched a grand plan: I was going to get into my writing career full-time and spend time in the Caribbean, an escape that represented both a fresh start and a healing journey. It was a vision that felt vibrant and invigorating, one that promised adventure and exploration beyond the familiar rhythm of my everyday life. However, there is a saying that when man/woman makes plans, God has other ideas, and soon I found myself at a crossroads. The decision loomed over me like a gray cloud, as I debated whether to sell my house, a space filled with years of memories and cherished moments. My daughter was in the market for a home, and after much deliberation, the decision was made to sell her my house, allowing me to stay with her while still spending my winters in the Caribbean.
I am a typical Caribbean woman of a certain age, deeply connected to my roots and heritage, which shape my identity and perspectives profoundly. I love antique furniture—the large china cabinet, credenza, antique chairs, and Queen Anne center table; they are more than just items to me; they are treasures that tell stories of the past. I always believed that they were the epitome of elegance, embodying a rich sense of character and history. Out of respect, my daughter decided to create my own living room and put her own touch in the rest of the house, which I appreciated, yet I couldn’t help but feel a sense of loss, a longing for the way things had always been.
The china cabinet was too big for my newly configured living room, so I decided to see if anyone wanted it, thinking it deserved a good home. My antique credenza was priceless, or so I thought, brimming with memories and stories only I could appreciate. So, I placed an ad on Facebook Marketplace as well as in my community WhatsApp chat, hoping to find someone who shared my appreciation for these items. However, the response was underwhelming. One lady showed up for the China cabinet and immediately declared that it was too big for the space she had, leaving me momentarily deflated. No one even showed interest in the credenza, and I scratched my head in wonderment, grappling with the perplexing thought of how everyone could not see the beauty in my priceless antiques.
Days turned into weeks, and with a heavy heart, I eventually decided to call sanitation for a special pickup truck, a decision that felt like a final farewell to a significant chapter in my life. I stood on my patio as the truck crushed my beautiful pieces of furniture, screaming “noooo” the whole time, a visceral reaction that echoed my heartbreak. My heart was breaking with each piece destroyed, and I felt that I would never get the image of those beautiful furniture being crushed out of my head, a haunting memory that lingered like a painful shadow over my spirit. It felt like a symbolic severing of ties to the past, marking the end of an era, and with it a spectrum of emotions that were hard to process.
Winter rolled around, and my thirst for the tropics took over; the allure of sun-soaked beaches and vibrant sunsets became impossible to resist. So, off to the homeland I went to mend my broken heart, seeking solace in the familiar warmth of the Caribbean sun, where I hoped to find healing amidst the gentle waves and fragrant breezes that had once brought me joy. The days there were painted with hues of tranquility, allowing me to reflect on the life I had lived and the significant transitions that had sculpted my journey thus far.
About a month and a half into my trip, I received an email. Someone wanted to interview me. I felt it strange because I did not apply for the job, it turned out they must have gotten my resume from a job board I had posted my resume on years ago. I did the interview and never expected to get called. About six weeks later I got a call that they wanted to check my references. At this point, a part of me was hoping they wouldn’t give me the job, because I had my retirement all planned. I returned to New York torn between staying retired and getting back in the job market. My apprehension grew as I reflected on my previous work experience in corporate America and the private sector; this job was a government position with a union, presenting a different environment from what I was used to.
My daughter did not think I should accept the job. “Ma, why would you want to come out of retirement?” she asked, her voice laced with concern for my well-being. “Try being locked up in a house all day talking to a dog who can’t answer you back?” I chuckled at her with humor, realizing that her concern was rooted in love. So, with a mixture of excitement and nervousness, I decided to give it a try. I went through my training and finally made it to my post. The first day, I fully expected to hate it. But surprisingly, to my delight, I loved the job and the team more than I could have ever anticipated. As days went by, my admiration and enjoyment for the work grew deeper.
Through this new chapter, I discovered a few enlightening truths about myself. I am quite adaptable; change, I realized, is necessary and healthy. We just have to let go of old stuff and ways of doing things and embrace the change that life presents us. The fear of change can often paralyze us, holding us back and bringing unnecessary pain. However, if we can release our baggage and face the changes in our lives, it could lead to beautiful new beginnings. Today, I don’t dwell on that furniture I lost; instead, I cherish the memories and lessons learned. I still have my chairs, side table, and Queen Anne table, remnants of my past that now feel like beacons of what I have overcome.
It dawned on me that I didn’t need to clutter up my space simply because I was afraid to let go of the old. My daughter eventually added a fireplace, did the floors, and bought new furniture that brought warmth and modernity into the home. And although I wouldn’t say it out loud, I recognized she has great taste, and I am growing to love her modern style. As for the pieces I once thought were to die for, I must admit they weren’t that cute at all in hindsight. One day, my daughter asked if I needed her help decorating my living room space. I was tempted to say no, wanting to hold on to what I thought was my vision. But I decided to accept her help this time. Surprising to me, with just some decorative cushions here and a few other thoughtful decorations there, my space transformed into something remarkably beautiful, while still maintaining it’s antique essence.
This experience reinforced a powerful lesson: Change is a healthy thing. Letting go can be liberating; it allows us to embrace new opportunities, expand our horizons, and revitalize our lives. When we hold onto the past, we often stifle our potential and limit our growth. By choosing to release old habits, fears, or even relationships that no longer serve us, we create space for fresh beginnings. Take a deep breath, step into the unknown, and embrace a healthy change, for it is through these transformations that we cultivate resilience, innovation, and a renewed sense of purpose. Each change brings with it a chance to learn and adapt, encouraging us to explore paths we may never have considered before, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling existence.
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Visit my website at http://www.trishsthill.com
Starting this blog was something I dreamt of doing for years. It was born of years of changes (good and bad), of inspiration and challenges. Being a creative person whose brain is always churning with ideas or issues, this blog offered me a creative outlet as well as an opportunity to share my stories laced with life’s challenges. I often thought of what a better world we would have if each of us tried in our own way to encourage and motivate each other. You never know what someone is going through and how one kind word or encouragement can brighten their day. Sometimes people feel stuck in moving forward with a plan or idea, and perhaps a perspective from someone motivated them to finally move forward. And so, I started this blog discussing the writing process mixed with life’s stories and challenges. Sometimes my ideas come from something I was reminded of, something I observed, or a challenge I had to overcome. This weekend I attended a yearly Vincentian picnic at Heckscher State Park. It is a lively, fun-filled family event where people from St. Vincent and the Grenadines come together to celebrate our culture. I will write an article on my experience at the picnic in a future blog post. But in this article, I want to cover something I heard mentioned several times while at the picnic – menopause.
This topic of menopause could be overwhelming to many, but I want to discuss it, not as an expert, but in terms of breaking it down and encouraging women to give themselves grace when they are going through this state in life, and, in general, to give another perspective. If we live long enough, all of us will go through menopause. It’s not an illness; it doesn’t have to be scary if we educate ourselves about it and make some adjustments to get more comfortable with it. Discussing menopause is not just for women; it is also for men who have women in their lives. All women past a certain age will have their menses cease. If you are like me, you wave a flag. I was glad to part ways with that part of my life. The cramps, bleeding, and other monthly disruptions to life were not pleasant. Some women fear menopause and lament about hot flashes, getting older, dryness, and all the peskiness that comes with this new stage of life. But I was happy to say goodbye to my monthly visitor.
But then I had to deal with the hot and cold flashes, excessive sweating, my voice sounded deeper, and my mood swings were off the charts. I started to ask myself: how did my mother deal with this? I realized that growing up in the Caribbean, I never heard the word menopause. In speaking with my mother, she told me that her monthly periods simply stopped. She didn’t seem to understand this whole thing that was spoken of as an illness where people need hormone replacement and medication to make them better. As someone with a curious mind, I started to question what the difference was between cultures where a woman simply went through this stage and embraced it, and other cultures where it is treated as a scary illness that needs to be managed with drugs. I spoke with some women from the African continent, and their mothers’ experiences were similar to that of my mother.
To put this in some context, I am a woman of a certain age who grew up in my home country in the sixties and seventies. We ate differently, consuming a lot of naturally grown foods that were even fertilized by natural fertilizer. Our diet was rich in root vegetables like yams, potatoes, tanias, edoes, dasheens, etc. These root vegetables are said to have a lot of plant estrogen, which is depleted in a woman’s body as she ages, and even our eggs, meat, and fish were organic. Both women from the Caribbean and those from the continent had a similar diet of natural foods grown organically. In my day, there were no barrels coming from America with processed foods, hormones, and all the foods laced with unhealthy substances that helped to mess us up. Today, almost everyone in the Caribbean is eating American foods from well-intended relatives who are trying to help their loved ones economically. The businesses are also importing this food to the detriment of the population.
Could our diet in the old days be the reason we never heard of menopause or saw our mothers going through hot flashes? I can only say that in my case, I made a concerted effort to eat as naturally as America would allow you. Because even when you try to go organic, the fertilizers are not the best, and even the seeds we use are not the best. But I remember cleaning up my diet the best I could. I consumed more root vegetables, less rice, and stayed away from bleached flour, sugar, and rice. I still had some hot flashes, but they were less and milder; my voice sounded less masculine, and my body felt better overall. I no longer heard people refer to me as “sir” on a phone call, and people began to be surprised at my age, in a good way. Was that the fix-it-all for my menopause journey? No, because I live in a country where not only is bad health profitable, but you also have to pay more to eat healthy.
So, menopause is coming for any woman who lives long enough. Don’t be scared of it. It could be a beautiful time for a host of reasons:
- no monthly visit from your bloody visitor. Your husbands would love that one.
- no pregnancy
- no contraceptives necessary
- hopefully, the kids are likely grown and off on their own
- you know your mature self much better than you ever did your younger self
Enjoy this phase of life. You are lucky to experience it, as many people overlook the beauty of transformation. You are not sick; it’s not something weird happening to you but rather a natural transition that many undergo. Your menses stopped; good riddance to the discomfort that can accompany those cycles. Instead, focus on the freedom that comes with getting to the phase of post menopause. Eat healthy, think positive, and embrace this new phase of your life. Take advantage of these opportunities to explore new hobbies and passions that may have once felt sidelined. Surround yourself with supportive friends and engage in uplifting conversations that enrich your spirit. This is a time for growth, reflection, and new beginnings, so cherish every moment of it.
Trish St.Hill 